You Know You're 50 When...

$ 9.95

Approaching the half-century milestone? Know someone who is? 

Baby boomers: we know you're out there. Whether you're about to hit the big Five-O or already have your AARP card, there are certain signs that you can't ignore. Because even if you feel like you're at the top of your game, you know you're 50 when...

Your main form of aerobic exercise is getting up to change the channel. You think a mosh pit is something found at the center of an exotic fruit. You wish the "ol' ticker" had quartz movement. "Performance anxiety" refers to golf...and bingo night. You read obituaries not to see who died but how long they lived. Twice in on night refers to bathroom visits.

So go aead and spend your kid's inheritance on a Porsche (and liposuction so you can fit into it) - you've got another 50 years to go!